By Erin Cranor
Would your children like to see you involved in their school? The younger they are, the more likely the answer is an emphatic, “Yes!” Children gain immeasurably from their parents’ volunteerism. The simple assurance that their parent is familiar with what school is like is a source of security. Given these and other benefits that come to our own children, becoming an involved parent becomes an inviting way to follow prophetic counsel to get involved in our communities and help make the world a better place.

And then there are the realities. The fact is that very few parents sail effortlessly into the perfect volunteer niche. With effort, though, many do find an ideal spot that truly makes the world better for the parent, the kids, and the school.

Here are a few possible solutions to common glitches faced by parent volunteers:

GLITCH: I have younger kids too small to have with me on campus.

TRY THIS: Does your child’s teacher have work you can take home? Does he or she need the Weekly Readers sorted out, or could you write up the class newsletter? Anything you can take care of for the teacher frees up time he or she can spend planning learning activities for your child’s class, and your child gets to see you working side-by-side, so to speak, with the teacher.

Already tried that, and the teacher couldn’t think of anything? Check again, regularly. Show your child’s teacher that you are genuine by asking every other day or so whether there is anything you can take home and work on. Do this for a few weeks in a row, and be dependable.

GLITCH: I can’t get my foot in the door.

TRY THIS: Become a familiar face. Introduce yourself to other parents, and get to know them. Find out how they are involved, and ask if you can help. Stop in the office regularly and let them know you are still looking for an opportunity to volunteer.

Still getting the cold shoulder after a few weeks? Try this sure-fire attention getter: praise. Choose one of the things that is really going right at your child’s school, and write a thank-you note that is specific and sincere. In your note, express your genuine desire to be a part of the school’s successes and ask for a phone call to discuss some way that you can become involved. Then, be dependable in whatever opportunity is offered. Things will blossom from there.

GLITCH: The PTA (or PTO, or other parent organization) is a clique.

TRY THIS: First, take a closer look. Are these parents really trying to exclude others, or are they just ineffective at welcoming others? If this is the case, offer patient friendship to one or more of the group, just helping that one person with his or her duties until the group at large becomes aware of you. Once that happens, you have an opportunity to influence the culture of the group toward a more open and welcoming way of getting things done.

Tried that, and it really is exclusive, after all? Move on. Parent groups that become clique-ish rarely accomplish much that is worth doing. Connect with someone else. Attend the Parent Advisory Committee (PAC) meeting for your school, region, or school board district. Find another parent who is helping outside the parent group, and lend a hand to him or her, or get to know your child’s teacher or one of the specialists in your child’s school. Could the librarian use help cleaning the books before she re-shelves them? Does the literacy specialist have students who need to practice reading aloud to someone?

GLITCH: The parent group wants me in, alright, but they’re doing something wrong.

TRY THIS: If the “something wrong” is something illegal or seriously unethical, get it out into the open right away. Check your facts first, and if you’re sure, blow the whistle. A parent group that has been breaking the law is going to have to be rebuilt from the ground up. It is better for everyone if that process gets started right away.

If the “something wrong” is more on the scale of something that is a waste of time, or something that could be done better, take a step back. Look at the people involved, and try to see the whole thing from an eternal perspective.
You are a child of God and so is the other person. When you step back into the situation, bring a lot of patience; look for the good things you can reinforce, and enjoy the opportunity to associate with another child of God, even if the project you are working on together is mighty silly. Good things will happen if you allow yourself to love people and let go of issues.

If the “something wrong” is a misuse of resources or something that really needs to change, say it. Bring it up clearly and often, but always with pure intent to accomplish the change. Be careful not to let vindictiveness creep in.
Remember that you and every other person involved are children of God, that
He has a relationship with each one, and that He will help you, if you ask, to see others as He sees them.

While this is by no means an exhaustive list of the “glitches” that parent volunteers may face, nearly all the rest of the problems have a similar solution. They almost always come down to relationships with other people, and building relationships with others almost always comes down to our relationship with God. Perhaps the best advice to parent volunteers was given centuries ago by the prophet Mormon:

“But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.

“Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love….” -Moroni 7:47-48

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