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Sep 2010 Issue
By Krista Ralston Oakes
When my husband and I moved to a new city, it was the first time we lived in a place where we didn’t know anyone. We were both starting new jobs in an area that we had previously known only during temple excursions.
Our new ward family quickly embraced us. We were called to be stake missionaries (today’s equivalent of ward missionaries), and we accepted the calling with faith that we would have the Lord’s help. That help came in unexpected ways, however, through the examples of new friends who were faithful members of other denominations.
My new co-workers were very friendly. One co-worker welcomed me to the company, and upon hearing that my husband and I had relocated from a different city, he asked, “Have you found a church home yet?”
This was something that had been suggested in our stake missionary meetings as a finding and fellowshipping activity when someone moves into our neighborhood. The term “church home” had otherwise been unfamiliar to me, but it was a term that was frequently used among non-LDS churchgoers. I came to realize that not all denominations have their congregations geographically determined, as we do with our ward and stake boundaries. As a result, it is not uncommon for a person of faith to be looking for a suitable place of worship when they move into a new area, and it would be a good way to introduce the church to a new neighbor.
At first, I wasn’t sure if I would ever be comfortable approaching a new move-in this way. I wondered if it would sound like a pushy way to make an introduction. But when my co-worker put me on the receiving end of this question, I didn’t consider it pushy at all. I thought it was a friendly question, and a rather practical one, too, from his perspective. My response was as comfortably delivered as his question.
I expressed appreciation for his thoughtfulness (and his assumption that I was a churchgoer) and then I was able to explain how our congregations were organized, so that my husband and I had a church home as soon as we knew our address. I was also able to describe the uniformity of our church administration, which made the transition very easy. Ours was a nice conversation, which cultivated mutual respect and trust. This experience removed all hesitation when I later had the opportunity to greet a new family that moved in down the street.
Many of my co-workers were devout in their various faiths. It was not uncommon to see religious books, quotes, or symbols in their workspaces. Many talked about Bible study classes on Wednesday nights.
They were comfortable living and expressing their diverse religious beliefs in friendly and non-threatening/non-confrontational ways.
Following their example, I soon found myself keeping a copy of the Book of Mormon in my office, and I became more at ease talking about my church activities and my appreciation for the Savior.
Several years later I was recruited into a new, smaller company. This time I worked alongside an orthodox Jew. We both practiced religions that were woven into our lifestyles, including our dress and appearance, our dietary restrictions, our language, and our Sabbath observance.
I never saw mocking or criticism of this co-worker’s peculiar lifestyle.
Instead, I observed great tolerance and respect. Company events involving food always included kosher selections. This co-worker’s business travel was never scheduled on his Sabbath, and it was also accepted that he would be out of the office and inaccessible by phone from sundown on Friday until sundown on Saturday. People watched their language around him. In response, this co-worker was a devoted employee who worked hard and returned kindness and respect. Similar accommodations were made for my LDS lifestyle, and I did my best to respond accordingly.
I also noticed that this co-worker was eager to explain not only what he practiced, but also why. Once again, I was on the receiving end of someone sharing their beliefs, and once again I felt appreciative of a friendly gesture rather than offended. This took nothing away from my own testimony of the Gospel, but instead provided a pattern for me to share my testimony more freely with others, without worrying about how it would be received. In time, the Book of Mormon in my office was shared with someone interested in reading it.
As I followed the examples of these friends who were happy to share what was of worth to them, I found it easy to shed all timidity about who
I was and what I believed, so that I could be more approachable to people who wanted to learn more.
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