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Nov 2010 Issue
By Stephanie McMillan
We could easily spend hours on a diatribe against “kids these days.” Texting, moody silence, tight clothing, baggy clothing, inappropriate music, foul language–the list is long and varied. Similarly, our parents could have complained about our faults and follies– different generation, same conversation.
We often get stuck in this negative paradigm, so much so that we sometimes fail to see what is right before us—a generation of young men and women who are preparing to lead us in faith and righteousness. Certainly, they will have bumps and bruises along the way. Their mistakes will be of varying degrees, and sometimes they will disappoint. But if we can for a moment look at the positive instead of dwelling on the negative, there are amazing things to see in our youth.
Case in point:
Have you ever had a Sunday morning where things don’t go exactly as planned? Or should I rephrase that question: Have you ever had a Sunday morning where things did go exactly as planned? If you have, you should be translated. We had our regular “not as planned” morning recently. The kind that caused me to stop, look my five-year-old in the eye and say, “If we’re late for the primary program and I have to sit in the back you’re busted, dude.”
We were late.
I sat in the back.
Alone.
It was a strange feeling. My children and husband were seated on the stand and there I
sat, a little unsure what to do, feeling like a foreigner in my own ward. So I sat reverently and pondered. As I did, my mind wandered to the young men passing the sacrament. Those next ten instructive minutes have been a cause for reflection and pondering.
These young men, twelve and thirteen year-olds, were so conscientious and so concerned about their priesthood duty. They were thrown off by the 100+ kids seated on the stand and the large congregation that had come to see their little munchkins.
You could sense in their demeanor, in their stances, in their faces, a strong desire to fulfill their responsibility. Yet, they were at times uncertain of where to turn, which direction to take. Their steps faltered.
The remarkable thing was not their uncertainty, but the process that unfolded. The older boys would silently and patiently help the younger ones steer through their pattern. There were missed steps, and few wrong turns, but the more experienced young men would reverently point or shake their head and an adjustment would be made. The congregation responded as well. They were patient and considerate, offering smiles of encouragement. More eyes than mine followed the progress of these boys, and I realized we were all willing them to be successful, to complete the task before them.
I breathed easier after those young men sat down, grateful they had completed their assigned Priesthood duty.
I have since reflected on that moment.
Sometimes we get stuck in the eye-rolling, breath-sucking, shaking-our-head mentality. But what if instead we were cheerleaders? What if we held our breath and prayed silently for success? What if we gave a nod of encouragement more often? What if we smiled regularly? What if we looked for the good instead of dwelling on the negative? What would we see?
If I looked in my own recent personal experience with the youth, I can pull out a list of things to be grateful for:
I see youth who serve with unselfishness and giving hearts. Last year, our stake president challenged us to dramatically increase our temple attendance. My first thought was, “we’ll have to up the babysitting budget for sure.” But I can count on one hand the times I paid a babysitter for their services. Young men and young women alike have time and again watched my children for no charge while we attended the temple. I am grateful for their service, and I see a love for the temple already growing in their young hearts.
I see young women who are already embracing their divine nature and gravitate toward nurturing those in need. One Sunday in Sacrament meeting I watched with a full heart as three different young women saw mothers struggling with children and quietly and quickly stepped up to lend a hand. This is a beautiful recurring pattern among our young women. They are practicing the art of serving, and preparing to become nurturers in their future homes.
I see youth, both young men and young women, who are examples of the believers for my young children. These youth know my children’s names, they high-five them in the hallways, they ask them questions about school and sports and friends. They stand as witnesses and give my children a pattern for their own lives.
So next time I sit in opening exercises on Wednesday night, when I’m tempted to see their faults, I’m going to look for the good. I’m going to remember their diligence in that Sacrament meeting. I will remember that they are learning, as I am, to do their duty. And I am going to smile, nod, and show my encouragement.
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